June 21, 2012 - For Immediate Release
Contact: Emma Haltsworth, Director of Public Relations
National Agency for Ethical Drone-Human Interactions
Washington, DC - The National Agency for Ethical Drone-Human Interactions (NEDHI) announced the formation of a Do Not Kill Registry, its first public program.
The National Agency for Ethical Drone-Human Interactions (N.E.D.H.I.) was founded in September of 2001 to monitor and regulate the use of drones both domestically and internationally.
While the use of drones is intentionally not bound by international treaties or constitutional limits, NEDHI simultaneously understand the urgent need to develop and enforce new ethical frameworks as drone use becomes more commonplace as a tool of U.S. foreign policy.
Through an active collaboration between N.E.D.H.I., the brave pilots and operators of the U.S. drone program, and the American public, NEDHI believes that it can find the political and moral solutions needed to both protect the security of the United States while also satisfying the concerns of the broader global community.
The Do Not Kill Registry, the agency's first public program, forges an innovative path towards new solutions that will help give people around the world the peace of mind urgently needed during these times of escalating drone conflict.
While what the future holds for the U.S. drone program remains uncertain, U.S. citizens can rest safely knowing that NEDHI will continue to diligently review and monitor the national drone kill list in order to ensure proper cautionary measures are taken while also continuing to take advantage of the military effectiveness of targeted drone strikes on militants around the world.
|NEDHI Director of Public Relations Emma Haltsworth |
on a recent field visit to Afghanistan.
When asked by a reporter at today's news conference whether the Do Not Kill Registry would have some of the nagging problems of the National Do Not Call Registry, Haltsworth retorted, "This is about alot more than robo calls. We're pushing for nothing less than 100 percent here."
Another reporter asked whether some people might mistakenly sign up on the National Do Not Call Registry thinking they are signing up for the Do Not Kill Registry Haltsworth paused for a moment and said, "We'll have to get back to you on that one."
You can read more about the agency and NEDHI's mission by clicking here.
For further information on the drone program and new Do Not Kill Registry citizens can contact NEDHI directly by e-mailing firstname.lastname@example.org.
DISCLAIMER: Adding your name to the 'Do Not Kill' Registry does not guarantee that you will not be the target of a drone strike but only that an additional review process will be undertaken before you are labeled an enemy militant and added to the national kill list.
Note: Thanks to the creative genius of the people at Occupy Wall Street for creating this wonderful parody on yet another dark chapter in the latter days of a dying empire. This "news release" was fashioned out of the following URLs created by Occupy Wall Street: http://occupywallst.org/article/add-yourself-national-do-not-kill/ and http://www.donotkill.net/about.php.